losing someone. 

Losing them for good.  I remember him Lord.  I still remember the first day we met, he stood there smiling, greeting me in his thick accent, and introducing himself.  I don’t always remember every first encounter but that one was memorable. What do you want to do with the memories?  He was good, so good, can’t you see that Lord?  Life has moved on so fast, as if it forgot him but time doesn’t ever completely wipe him from our memories.  I pray Lord be with him wherever he is, let him be free with you.  Let his cheerful countenance never leave him at least in our memories.  And please, I beg you to never let me lose another soul again like that.  To the disease of the mind.  Sometimes it hurts right through my soul where it seems that continually troubled waters go.  But there’s some beauty in the shattered pieces and brokenness that he tried to be rid of but didn’t realise remained.  Nevermind their permanence. Instead, help us make them into beautiful mosaic compositions, each of us with our unique memories and experiences with him.   How does the peaceful waterfall flow except only through falling water?  I love him and always will.  Thank you for him Lord. 

The Gift of Faith

Something never earned but received. 

Just like that unexpected hand held out to be received. 

Freely embraced back.

Dancing, dancing in His never forsaking embrace.  


Received as his adopted child, valued, not shoved aside, rendered useless or ignored.

Actively pursued and considered beloved.    

Not demanded to do anything to remain in that position.   

No longer wanting my own way but wanting His more. 


Still fearful and asking Him to not forsake if I fall the wrong way.  

But rest assured I’m safe.

Reminded He’ll catch me under his shelter in the storm no matter how ugly things get.  


Lord, thank you that you reach out to me even in the depths of my sin. Reminded by my brothers. 

When my heart wants nothing more but to rebel. 

Mind rushes into indulging in fleshful urges. 

He does rescue me. Gives me a renewed hope. 

Reminds me that I am enough not because of myself but because He restored and redeemed me.


What great gift of love and grace that is.  

How grateful I am for that.  

Yes I’ll go running, yes I’ll go racing toward Him. 

Until we’re face to face, held in a tight embrace.  

Perfectly united.

He Found Me

He hears me, in desperate cries. 
Even at the lowest lows
when I wanted Him to take me from existence. 

He saw every struggle with sin,
all the spiritual warfare. 
Remained with me through it all
Never ceasing to remind me,
he would never leave. 

He says “Be strong and courageous. 
Do not be afraid or terrified because of them,
for the Lord your God goes with you; 
he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Deuteronomy 31:6 NIV 

He helps me find him as he says
“For everyone who asks receives;
the one who seeks finds;
and to the one who knocks,
the door will be opened.
Luke 11:10 NIV

He forgave me, not reading into my words too much,
but more into what was best for me & my brothers/sisters. 
Yes amen, He interceded for me.  

O thank God, praise the Lord Almighty,
all-knowing, & His ever-present presence. 
In lonely moments when I felt ugly
or unloveable he gave me little reminders of his love & beauty.  

In little rays of sunshine on a bunch of purply blue flowers after the rain. 
Through a little injured bird who looked up,
reminding me to look up in midst of difficulty.

He knew it all and He still knows it all.  
He knows it all even of you too,
I hope you know
truly how great His love is. 

He gives me hope by showing me that one sinner (see Luke 23:32-43)
on the cross next to him who asks Jesus to remember him. 
He softens the blows of others who tell me I’m the other. 

He tells me I’m enough.
Blots out my filth, remembering it no more. 
He tells me just like that one that went astray,
so did He care for me also.

It says “What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should perish.” Matthew 18:12-14 NIV 

Please God, please help me be strong
enough to reflect even just a fraction of your love.  
Please God help me to walk away
from that sin that constantly creeps up on me,
calling me, enticing me to indulge in it. 

Please never cease to move
the cloud that brings misunderstanding, fears & dread.

I’m yours Lord. 
And only by you, Jesus, can I walk rightly.  
Please help me do this by you Lord.  Thank you.
In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

As is said
“Speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit.
Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord” Ephesians 5:19 NIV


Oh how I can barely wait to. 

Three – In – One

In these three pieces of artwork I explain the meaning here. They are based on some of the verses of the bible that I find most encouraging, ones that I can’t help but find speaking out every time I read them.

Two mustard trees represent the verse about having faith the size of a mustard seed.  
Matthew 17:20 NIV
He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” 

Water at the root of the tree represents the tree planted by living water.
Jeremiah 17:7-8 NIV
“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
whose confidence is in him. 
They will be like a tree planted by the water
    that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
    its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
    and never fails to bear fruit.”

The roses represent Paul’s thorn in 2 Corinthians 12.  Verse 9-10 NIV says “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.  

The clover which the three hearts create represent the Holy Trinity and the deers represent us living in Christ.   

Ephesians 4:4-6 NIV There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

Psalm 42:1-2 NIV
“As the deer pants for streams of water, 
so my soul pants for you, my God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?” 

And lastly although I don’t do justice to His beauty and glory, the Holy Spirit was supposed to be represented by a dove. 

Luke 3:21-22 NIV When all the people were being baptized, Jesus was baptized too. And as he was praying, heaven was opened and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form like a dove. And a voice came from heaven: “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.”

John 14:26 AMP But the Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name [in My place, to represent Me and act on My behalf], He will teach you all things. And He will help you remember everything that I have told you.