I just want a moment to be free. Free from this world and its limitations.
Free from suffering and longing, longing for more. Longing for love.
If it weren’t so painful maybe they would still be here, the lost ones. O God I miss them.
Free. Free from those words of judgement.
So painful the cut.
Not being good enough, or not having tried hard enough, like nothing I could do was enough.
What? What did I do to deserve those words shoved at me, that God wouldn’t look at me as a good and faithful servant.
But no, you called me out of darkness.
You spoke to that girl and told her to tell me you’ll see me.
What comfort and relief that is.
Another time was I the man who laughed at you Lord?
Who didn’t acknowledge who you were? Who mocked you?
Lord, please, no. I want to be remembered by you and hear you.
I’m wondering…
If the different races could stand a chance
If the separation based on skin colour, status, and occupation weren’t so important
What would this world be?
Freedom from myself, freedom from these thoughts, how would that be?
But whatever I do please let it be for your glory Lord.
Let your warmth shine out. Let your heart show.
Even though I’m so limited, so limited, humanly as a woman.
Thank you for everything and for everything you’ve made us to be. Let it all be for you.
Amen.